By Jim Thornton:
Why Celtic Must Sack Neil Lennon
It’s not Celtic’s fault that they’re long odds-on to win the SPL. They’ve got better players and deeper pockets than anyone else in the division, so it would be a major upset if they failed to do the business. But that hardly makes for exciting spectating during the long winter months. So, in the spirit of encouraging healthy competition, why doesn’t Peter Lawwell do his bit to make the league more interesting by sacking Neil Lennon and replacing him with Craig Burley. That would even things up a bit, wouldn’t it?
Sorry, Wrong Number
Kilmarnock chairman Michael Johnston has had his players phoning fans to help sell season tickets. So if you live in Ayrshire, don’t be surprised if the operator rings to ask if you’ll accept a reverse-charge call from a Mr Pascali.
A Spokesman for the Chairman Said …
Staying with Killie, manager Kenny Shiels was bumping his gums the other day about why SPL2 should be formed for season 2013-14, and why Rangers should be part of it. In essence, Kenny’s argument was that the Ibrox side shouldn’t have to waste their time in the lower leagues playing wee diddy teams.
Well, Kenny, I’m old enough to remember Kilmarnock, Tommy Burns et al, having to do just that. Killie earned their place back in the top league by winning games on the park. So why shouldn’t Rangers? Perhaps you’re spending too much time listening to your chairman.
And the Third Division Runners-Up Are …
Yes, the Olympics were great, but there’ll be another lot along in four years. And why the big fuss about Rory McIlroy winning the USPGA? He’ll win plenty more majors before too long. For me, the big sports story of the weekend was Clyde coming from two goals down against Montrose to win the first league game of the season.
Everything’s in our own hands now; win our remaining 35 games and the title’s ours. We don’t have to depend on anyone else doing us favours. And we’re officially not the worst team in Glasgow any more. Our next game’s against Peterhead; that should be an easy three points seeing they couldn’t even win at home last weekend.
God, these happy pills are good.
Note: The above reflects the author’s opinions at the time of writing. He fully reserves the right to retract them at any point and to totally contradict himself if future results and performances fall below his exacting high standards. In that event, he would expect manager Jim Duffy to do the honourable thing and tender his resignation, and for his assistant Chic Charnley to follow his example and fall on his sword.
A Fool and his Money
Mad Vlad for the time being has his sensible head on and is trying to keep Hearts on an even keel financially. That might mean a wee bit of a struggle this season until things settle down. In the meantime, I’m tempted to put the last of my holiday money on Hibs finishing higher in the league than the Jambos. Any takers?
And I’d double it up with Ross County finishing in the top six. People still think of them as a wee diddy team, and forget they finished so far ahead in the First Division last season that a Chinese swimmer wouldn’t have caught them. Remember where you heard it first.
I told you these happy pills were good, didn’t I?
There’s been more than enough bad feeling over the years between Rangers and Aberdeen fans, especially because of Neil Simpson’s infamous tackle on Ian Durrant all those years ago. So it was good to hear Derek Ferguson on BBC Radio Scotland the other night praising Simpson to the skies, and saying he was sure that the Aberdeen player didn’t set out to injure his opponent.
Now if Ferguson, a bluenose’s bluenose if ever there was one, can forgive and forget, why can’t everyone else calm down and carry on? Silly question, really.
You Only Yodel When You’re Winning
England’s game against Italy the other night was at the Wankdorf Stadium in Switzerland, home of that famous side, Young Boys of Berne. Legend has it that when the club were building a new stand they ran into financial difficulties, which prompted the headline in a local paper: ‘Young Boys in Wankdorf Erection Problem’.